Who Are You?


We’re on hole number three and I could barely reach the fairway with my driver. I play as if I’m a first-time golfer. My shoulders slump, my head hung and my entire being screams of unhappiness. I can’t even manage a smile! This round of golf is ruining my day. When will this ever end? Why am I making a spectacle of myself? Why do I pretend I could play golf? I shouldn’t have golfed today. It’s turning into my worst day ever. The more negative self-talk, the worse my shots. All I could see was the next four to five hours of self-torturing for the remaining holes.

Then it hit me like a golf ball between the eyes−golf is determining my feelings, my mood, and it’s messing up the entire day! It’s not good for my self-worth.

Why on earth do I allow something I’m supposedly do for rest, restoration, and fun to push me down and into the dark deepness of self-hate?

The sun is shining, it’s springtime and a beautiful day in SoCal. I could observe the beauty of my surroundings, smell the fragrance of flowers, enjoy the cool air, enjoy the company of the people I’m playing with! But I missed out on the beauty of the moment because I allowed golf to determine who I was at that moment.

What about you? What do you allow in the moment to determine your worthiness and identity?

Maybe your identity is grounded in your relationship with your spouse, kids, parents, and friends. The relationships provide security and identity we’re looking for. What if something goes wrong with the relationship? How do you feel about yourself? It is the end of your “world”?

Or have you become that position that you fulfil at work: The Vice-president, the director, the manager, the engineer, the workaholic? Or maybe you’re a sport star, an Olympic swimmer, athlete, or a champion golfer?

When something happens to disturb your equilibrium and peace, do you still know who you are?

Or maybe you’re defined by your past? Labels like “alcoholic, drug-addict, adulterer, cheater, liar, angry, hostile, full of injustice, sexually immoral, envious, etc.” stuck with you. The accuser of your soul’s objective is to keep you in bondage and reminds you continually about your past.

When we base our identity on our past, professions, possessions, passions, and piers or on our beauty, body, youth, health, and relationships, we are bound to be disappointed and lose heart easily. It destroys our enjoyment in the moment and leads to depression. We find ourselves struggling with our worthiness and identity.

Is there a better way to live life?

I’m so happy you asked. Yes.

Stop focusing on the loud lies of the world. Hear the soft whispers of God’s truth.

You are a child of God.

You are loved by God. (5)

You are worthy.

You are enough.

You are forgiven, redeemed, and restored.

There is no condemnation for you who are in Christ.(6)

You are capable through power of Jesus.

You are God’s masterpiece, (7) wonderfully and fearfully made in his image.

You are a temple of the Holy Spirit. (8)

You are chosen, God’s holy people (9)

You are gifted and equipped. (10)

God’s love cannot be nullified by a bad day on the golf course, being fired by your boss, labeled by your divorce, or any failures, faults, or sins in your past. You are who God says you are.

Getting back to my golf experience, I’m not allowing golf to determine my feelings, mood, or worthiness anymore. Yes, I still hit bad shots, but it’s not ruining my day. I play shot by shot, enjoy the moment, smell the flowers, hear the birds, notice the beauty around me, love the people I play with. Most of all I’m thankful that I’m still alive and well, able, and privileged enough to engage in the sport.

Remember, you are not what others say you are, or what the enemy says−you are who God says you are! Hold onto the truth of who you are in Jesus Christ.

How can I help you on this journey? Or let me know how I can pray for you. Leave a comment.

Until Next Time

Anita Beukman

Your Hope Coach

Scripture References:
   1. Genesis 1: 27
   2. Romans 3: 23 – 25
   3. Romans 8: 15
   4. Matthew 28:19
   5. Romans 5: 5
   6. Romans 8: 1
   7. Ephesians 2: 10
   8. 1 Corinthians 6: 9
   9. 1 Peter 2: 9
   10. 1 Peter 4: 10

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